The Parental Legacy

It's funny when you reach that point in your life when you can actually see the humanity of your parents. Not just the fact that they are/were your heroes, but that they also possessed weaknesses.



I hit that moment fairly early... like when I was 8. My parents also had this nasty habit of accusing us of being exactly like [insert other parent's name] when we exhibited any negative traits. It's amusing to note that they never laid claim to anything genetically handed down that was even remotely negative or undesirable, but quick to claim their grand influence when it was something accolade-worthy.



We all grow up thinking (most of us at least unless you have perfect parents) "I don't want to end up like that!"



Me, I'm realizing that you can't fight nature or nurture in this case. I won't go over the obvious physical traits I've inherited (where much to my chagrin I look mostly like my Dad), but I will talk about the various personality traits instead.



My mother is the perfectionist, the martyr, the tough love parent and I have taken on ALL these traits. I will do a job and let it take forever until it's perfect, and even then, will think it's not my best. I will self-sacrifice to no end, and then wonder why my needs aren't met. And to the people I love most in this world, I will be unyielding if they need my honesty, and supremely stubborn if I think they're behaving in the wrong. My empathy for other people is also from my Mom. I believe that we have it in our power to change the world, one person at a time, one good deed at a time, and for this I'm eternally grateful.



My father is the fun-loving, procrastinating, jokester, who is a loud talker, big eater, and lover of all things. He is excess and will-ful, and I am all those things too. I love to enjoy and play, and crack jokes all the time. I love food probably more than he does, and have tried to avoid being the pack-rat he is. (I'm an immigrant kid, so it's harder than I anticipated). My sense of fun, and its importance in everyday life is from him. So is my sense of adventure, and trying new things. My Dad is the first guy to suggest taking a different route, and/or driving for the sake of it.



From the combination of all these traits it would seem that I'm schizophrenic in temperment. I think it's kind of true. Inside of me brews a battle between these two very different personality imprints... so in a way I'm constantly trying to achieve harmony between the two.



I like to think that my parents bestowed upon me a unique combination.



I call myself a structured artist, or a spontaneous planner. Best of both worlds I think.



Thanks Mom and Dad. I love you.